went to sch today to study... haha by the first 4 hrs in the library from 8am to 12nn, seemed to have done more work than the earlier 3 days combineddd. FML why did i waste away the last few days D: ahhhh.
need to be more motivateddd. MUST BE. WILL BE. rawrrrrhhhhh self-psyche let's go. hahaha i realised if you and the pple you hang around with feel damn slack/keep complaining all the time, the negativity hangs around you like a heavy shroud... and makes you tired/sick of doing work before you even start. i must work hard, so i can do well/better, so i can feel good when the papers come back. please please please please let hard work pay off. i don't think i could take it like CT2 again... studied so hard in june (the hardest ever since jc started) but got the lowest grades in jc ever. sigh. but i guess i was studying kinda stupidly... and the upward climb is supposed to be harder, now stuff should be getting easier, cannot let the work go to waste D:
i kicked my dad's ipad out of my room so i wouldn't surf on it. now if only i can continue leaving it outside. i even pasted "don't digress, study hard" post its all around my room's danger spots like the (trashy) bookshelf, the computer, the table zzzxc They better work!!
at least today's studying was quite gd :D studied by myself all the way till 2pm (library was relatively uncrowded!!) then met jordan buddy for lunch! haha wahh so nice, lunch was free xD a veryyy late belated birthday treat, but haha its the thought that counts :) yay for wonderful parddners in blyc and archery who can just directly ask you to eat with them/study with them/blah. so straightforward and uncomplicated. well, not like i don't want to eat with classmates, i really want to... but somehow it feels like we all don't bother to keep in touch outside of class... which is sad D: nn sometimes i feel like contacting them out of the blue/when something comes up, but we don't have a history of doing so to ea other, so i stop myself :/ sigh. if i don't sms you first, how many would actually contact me? very few. well, such is life.
but its really a fact that people only grow closer when they spend most time together/interact most with ea other. whether thru face-to-face or even (especially) online/mobile. it's no wonder that 80% of my closer friends are those who i interact with out of school, even though we see each other sometimes (but not most often) in sch.
it's quite rubbish when pple say friendships cant be sustained through msn/distance. it can, but it must be in addition to real life interaction (obviously those online gaming friends who you've never met before cannot be your best buds). though its a mystery to me why most of those who are frequently online are majority from one gender. i guess girls don't go on msn much :/ and manyyyy don't leave their phones on. besides the regular few dears i contact.
haiz. what can i do friend. i miss you, but i cannot do anything about it if you don't even respond.
and lacklustre replies that are one sentence (no, how about one phrase) long in sms, what am i to reply? and then i hear you type so much longer to others. and i get sad. and then now i tell myself not to care.
how did this post end emo-ly? didnt set out to do so. so anyways, let's end with a picture.
yummyyyyy :) please let life be this sweet.
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